A very special opportunity has come up for me to pose your questions to Shaun… and maybe some of the Mad As Hell cast and writers!
You have till this Wednesday (18th) to email or “comment” the questions you would like answered. I can’t guarantee who will be free to answer questions, but there’s only one way to find out!
It was a tense discussion between an AIS official and a sports agent, as they argued about re-instating a former drug cheat back into the competition. The agent begged for his client to be heard, and when the official relented, in walked – a race horse. While the official didn’t believe the authenticity of the hand written note (“he’s got hooves”), he did suspend the ban, but the whole incident made him… as mad as hell!
Before Shaun could even start, Roz crashed her scooter into the set. And both Tony Abbott and Cambell Newman have had similar incidents, as had a whole list of politicians. Both Abbott and Gillard have been campaigning for and against the carbon tax recently, but also showing off their skills – Abbott assembled a wheelie bin to store asylum seekers. His logic to turn around the boats – “it was done in the past, it can be done in the future” – didn’t work for Young Talent Time.
Bobo Gargle, Rear P(r)etty Officer with the Navy, says he doesn’t have the powers of King Neptune to command the sea and turn around the boats, nor does he have a Kraken. In his opinion, it’s about perception – Christmas Island should be renamed to something less fun. Shove Tuesday would still be too nice, so Shaun suggested “Boxing Day Island”, the day we usually return presents. Shaun made the point that most illegal immigrants come via plane and overstay their Visas, but the petty officer said it was a can of worms to shoot down aircraft on the possibility there was someone on board who might overstay their visa.
It comes down to ASIO not having have enough staff to complete the security checks, but there is controversy in how their counter-latest terrorism operations are run – Grace Jones filed the story.. right down. She interviewed “Ferdinand St Monstermash” (not his real name) about some of the operations ASIO was doing – involving hiding listening devices on animals and spamming mobiles to detonate bombs, including explosive underpants hanging on a washing line.
On the subject of bombshells, Shaun checked in with Consuela Manatee who is back in London at the Ecuadorian embassy where Julian Assange is staying. She revealed he is a bad house guest, leaving his towels around, always on the phone and using all the Internet bandwidth to Google himself.
So Julian is a hero for hacking into private emails, but Rupert Murdoch is a pariah for hacking into mobile phones – it’s hypocrasy! Murdoch has hacked News Corp into two arms, but keeps a foot in both arms. Shaun spoke to media analyst Hermione Vibes, who says The News of The World was a disaster for Rupert, but so is The Sun – the newspaper, not the son, James. Nor the Sun at the cente of the solar system. Shaun warns against ever looking directly at it, and Herminoe agreed – “it’s a fucking terrible newspaper”.
Back at Murdoch’s Antipodean newspapers, there are cracks beginning to show, as their involvement in the Peter Slipper saga has become more about creating the news than reporting it. Time and Tide Correspondent Mathius Grogan, thinks the story has a lot in common with Watergate, even though the reporters in that incident worked after the event, while Steve Lewis reported on it during the event. The only common part was the concealment – notably Christopher Pyne concealing his blemishes.
Murdoch’s new paywalls may need some spak-filler, as a new Xanthe Kalamazoo reports. The editor of the Herald Sun, Simon Pristol has resigned, and announced his recognisition the only way he knew how – by a paper delivery round. And Fairfax is strugling too, with a few recent resignations. Xanthe interviewed a couple, Lionel (Stephen Hall) and Betty (Emily) Bronte, who sell ink cartridges. But Lionel makes his own ink from the 2000-3000 squid he owns, and if their business has to close, Betty’s going to turn them into calamari.
Back at the desk, Shaun and the Petty Officer re-enacted a scene for Clash of the Titans (!?) – “Brother, it is time for the mortals to pay. My child awaits your will.” “Release the Kraken!” Michael Ward appeared at the Kraken.
At the ABC Shop, there are a great range of tie-ins with popular ABC shows, including a 4 Corners Snow Dome and 320 gram pack of David Stratton beard trimmings. They need something to show the senate estimates committee!
Roz arrived on scooter with some breaking news, missing Tasmanian man Albert Duckworth has been located – in exactly the same pose as the police mannequin which had been setup for search for him. Roz won’t have any futher news on this.
A famous marriage was announced over this week, it was fun to watch, but seemed a bit wierd. It’s always going be hard when one party is more popular, has the power, and is part of a extremist cult. But was it Katie and Tom or The Greens and Labor?
It’s all about alligence, and even the Girl Guides have removed theirs to the queen and god. Josie Twinge reported on how it’s upset usually conservative monarchists, who have resorted to drive-bys on guide halls. Josie spoke to two guides in favour of the change – one who is a republican, the other who is a satanist. If Lord Baden Powell were alive today, he’d be alarmed at his state of decomposition.
Top of the Vox Pops this week: Should we put a cap on petrol tanks? One woman was upset that South Korea wanted to decimate the whale population – that was Japan’s job. And Nobby wouldn’t be poor if you paid him a million dollars.
Still on the countdown to the Olympics, Shaun spoke to Maggie Bathysphere again in the ABC sports commentary box. There’s been no interest in Wimbledon, since all the Australian’s are out, and all the information on the Tour de France comes via Maggie’s sister.
But the biggest news on the Olympics comes from a spat between two equestrian champions over the issue of preferential treatment in the qualification. What started as a pleasant conversation with Myfanwy, turned into an argument, and then a full scale fight right on the desk!
On the 43rd anniversary of man landing on the moon, Francis again spoke to William Duthie to get the Wisdom of the Elders. Bill had worked at the radio telescope in Parkes, but was surprised we as Australians had the ability to build a radio telescope, or even turn it on. He was more in-awe of the Americans. He advised on the movie The Dish – advised them not to make it, as the Americans looked not as ‘god like’ as they really were. Bill wishes he’d been born American, and had once even received an letter from Buzz Aldrin….’s solicitors.
Finally, what have we learnt from the faux electioneering of Gillard and Abbott? Abbott certainly has tried everything, from calming rodents, collecting wool, identifying the ground John Howard has walked on from the smell, and almost keeping his tongue in while sewing. While the Prime Minister has been meeting children… and meeting children.
Well, talking about it… he’s already “on it”. 🙂
In a tidbit with The Age’s Green Guide, Shaun talks about what he used to watch on TV when he was younger. (He revealed in an earlier interview with this website that he doesn’t watch much on TV these days.)
I remember when I was about 15 I was watching The Don Lane Show and Bert Newton rode into the studio on an elephant. I thought: ”Wow, that’s what I want to be when I grow up.’
Sadly, I am now almost 50 years old and am neither Bert Newton nor an elephant.‘
Photo by Simon Schluter
“Warning: May Contain Traces of God Particle.”
Shaun was happy that Melinda Taylor was out, but he misses Muammar Gaddafi, and doesn’t think the misunderstanding in Libya would have happened under his leadership. Even his “look” which commanded authority is missing, except in the Flight Centre ad. The ABS figures are also out, but only by 30-35,000.
The Carbon Tax has been in-place for a week, and if we put a thermometer under the earth’s armpit it would surely show that it’s cooler. But what about the people who pay the tax – us. It burns Shaun up that it’s our responsibility: ‘An Inconvenient Strewth’. Some of the interviews tonight might get a bit hairy, so Sophie Mirabella has joined the show as a St John’s Ambulance volunteer (after her sterling job on Q&A).
Puffy Kardashian Jnr (Francis), spokesman for Greg Combet, told Shaun it was very cynical to say that the tax is just about us making feel good about saving the environment, a bit like buying The Big Issue, but doesn’t actually change anything. It’s about convincing people to buy product which is cheaper because it is greener and it doesn’t attract the tax, rather than the polluting product which will now be more expensive. So why the household assistance package? Isn’t this a disincentive from buying the cheaper product? Puffy was speechless, then terminated the interview and stormed off, to hide in the spiral staircase.
When Shaun asked opposition spokesman, Siziwang Bana (Roz) if they would abolish the Carbon Tax AND the assistance package, she also told him that was very cynical attitude. She then used a bunch of sound bite opinions to describe how Australian’s feel about that tax, before telling Shaun that tackling climate change wasn’t about sound bites. It was then that Shaun noticed the antenna in her ear, receiving signals for what to say. She panicked and went to hide in the spiral staircase, with Puffy.
Fellow newsman Alan Jones thinks that the Labor party has become a divisive cult, but Shaun thinks he’s heard Alan called the same thing.
But Climate Change is about science and facts, and science-ographer Dr Barney Tremelo from CSO Fortescue Metals surprised Shaun by admitting the temperature of the earth was changing. But he argues we’re all too lazy to reduce our CO2 levels. 9/11 showed us that during the embargo on air travel, the lack of fuel particles made the earth warmer – we need to emit more to reflect the sunlight and save us from the CO2 produced by our “rainforests”. When Shaun asked for identification, he bolted for the staircase, but seeing it was full, ran out of the studio, through the ABC and the carpark to a waiting taxi.
Barney took refuge in his home, had a good night’s sleep and felt better in the morning. But without any milk, he made a trip to the shops, at it was here that a piano fell on him. “Insanity gone mad.”
Tony Abbott made his pledge to abandon the carbon tax in newspapers, which seems like he doesn’t want anyone to be aware of it, considering its an obsolete medium.
Xanthe Kalamazoo returned to look at the whether there was life in newspapers yet, discussing it with Caitlin Braniac, who likened News Corp separating their newspaper division from the film and TV division to a pirate hacking off a gangrenous leg. But Fairfax is breathing life into it’s “leg”, and changing the shape of it – not just to Tabloid size, but also Rhomboid, for columnists with an unusual angle.
Desiree Fulton (Emily) reported on the businesses that would be affected by the demise of newspapers: a Paper Mache business which no longer has a way to make its product, a Fish and Chippery which now uses iPads to serve their orders, and a Pet Shop which is now using iPhones to line the bottom of budgie (and parrot) cages. For newspapers it seems, are not just resting, they’ve expired, gone to meet their maker… they are an ex-medium. [Nothing like a Monty Python reference!]
The view from the Top of the Vox Pops started with a choreographed dance to Craig Emerson’s ‘Horror Movie’ performance before asking – “Should Craig Emerson be sent offshore for processing?” One couple was against more Librarian’s coming in, but Libyans were OK if they were qualified, and Nobby was back reminiscing about his 21st.
During the break, Miss Fisher was looking at the bludgeoned corpse of satire, diagnosing a dose of cheap innuendo and exaggerated character acting to cover the lack of content – but don’t dare suggest it be her.
Shaun looked at the new slogan of the Liberal party, “Hope Reward Opportunity” which is filled with such aspiration, but also a subliminal message: Ho ward. But Clive Palmer says that the Liberal’s are Stalinist, and wants to remove lobbyists from the party.To make that happen, Ian Smoothie, a spokesman, says Clive will need to get a group of people together who share his view to help enact change. When Shaun pointed out the irony, Ian tried to bolt, but Shaun convinced him to stay. He then asked Ian to tell us what it is Clive wants, which Ian then said, in Clive’s words and almost exact intonation – for over a minute.
Lack of respect of tradition raises Shaun’s ire. And the Prime Minister wants to get swap our 100 year old copper telephone network with the NBN. Where’s the respect for its years of service!? And why? Just so that she can compete with Korea. Shaun’s just not sure which one – there’s at least two we know of! North Korea don’t even have the Internet, but they do have respect for tradition, such as their celebrations in remembrance of Kim Il-sung. But Shaun thinks Julia is actually jealous of how their leader gets to drive a tank, compare uniforms with her generals or have thousands offer to do the dusting. Just don’t send Julia a message from regional Australia – it will take ages to download.
The NBN will help people access online casinos, but when the government reneged on its plan to impose restrictions on the industry, the lobby groups went “bunta”. Trudy Progrock reported on if self-regulation was working, and a representative from Magic Unicorn Amusements showed off their latest range, which doesn’t have any flashing lights or pleasure at all. But the secret is actually the chairs, which has magnets to keep patrons on their chairs until all their change and metallic objects have been fed into the machine. When the representative was confronted about this, she too bolted.
In world news (“don’t switch off, it concerns us!”), and with the newly voted leader of the exiled Tibet government visiting Australia, Shaun crossed to the Mad As Hell Chinese Affiliate, who assured us that everything was fine in Tibet. She also advised that none of our leaders, no matter how lowly, should meet with the trator for the sake of peace and harmony with the fair and wise China.
Gay March talked with Shaun about the Queen’s visit to Ireland, where the theme was reconciliation – and reminding them she still ran their country, and they better not forget it. She even met a former IRA leader, who managed to give Prince Philip a good fright.
Finally, Shaun touched on the winding back of the atomic clocks by one second this week, which was a good opportunity to think about others. Shaun used it to sleep in.
“Print version no longer available”
Shaun had mixed feelings this week, because Julian Assange was in trouble for running circles around the American judicial system, but Black Caviar could run in a circle around Royal Ascot and gets to come home. The whole topic of Justice has made Shaun flip his wig.
Will Sweden send Julian to the US for trial? Shaun consulted the former Frida from Bjorn Again (Roz), who insisted that Sweden was a nice, normal country which was less likely to do American’s bidding than Australia. Although, if Shaun wants to know if an extraction team will be sent in, ala Mossad and Adolf Eichmann, he would have to consult an Israeli tribute band. Without a Topol impersonator, he deferred to Becky Stoat, Barbra Striesand impersonator, who described the whole incident.
Bob Carr might say there’s no evidence of a secret extradition order, but we know it exists, just like the Yeti who works at a gas station in Memphis. Darbyshire Greenback from the US State Department, insists that Guantanamo will be closed in 2009 and there is no extradition treaty that Shaun is aware of.
If Ecuador do accept Assange, he will be in the hands of their justice system. Consuela Manatee, special envoy to the Ecudorian embassy, is on holiday… in Australia, and said Assange would be protected by the UNESCO World Heritage, like most of the country.
Xanthe Calamazoo began a discussion on privately run prisons. She reported on a prime example of a private prison in NSW, that is it was only divisible by one and itself. Jim Booth (Francis), owner/manager, lamented the time they opened the doors and all the prisoners escaped. One prisoner, Steve (Tosh), has learnt his lesson – to knock over an easier ATM. In the studio, Xanthe interviewed Maree Spoons who insisted it was a cycle from birth to prison to birth. Back to Jim, he didn’t apologise for the fact they lock out anyone who doesn’t return from day release.
Xanthe pointed out that people who know say retribution and rehabilitation don’t work together, but decided to ask someone who didn’t know [Played by Stephen Hall, one the writers] – he didn’t know.
The Top of the Vox Pops topic was “Should gay marriage by compulsory?”, but no-one really answered the question.
Shaun discussed the recent Newspoll results, and drew the conclusion that Australians wanted a coalition government with the preferred PM, Julia Gillard, as the leader, requiring Tony Abbott to join Labor, except that Kevin Rudd is the preferred Labor leader, but not with Tim Matheson.
Shaun unfashionably likes Tony Abbott, because he has the strength to say to the government “whatever it is you’re doing, I disagree with it 100%”. But he’s concerned that Tony’s old passion has disappeared, and blames Christopher Pyne’s laser eyes.
Invasion of privacy really gets Shaun’s dander up. Kate Moss was at the Gippsland home of a family who was requesting privacy after their son was found trafficking cannabis. The media may have left, but Kate would remain to make sure the family were indeed left alone.
Shaun was keen to salute the efforts of Sky News again, who when reporting on the Melbourne Water overcharge scandal, used 35 seconds of footage of water coming from taps, sinks, showers, washing machines, hoses, hoses and more hoses and back to taps – just to illustrate the point. Shaun then illustrated what winning two Walkleys would be like – not just one, but two.
In the break, the Australian Defence Force was recruiting with the slogan “deferring to the US wherever we can”. The latest Worksafe ad showed Simon, an intern at Worksafe, having an incident with a photocopier. And in the next BackBenched, Kevin Rudd can’t believe the government still has support ahead of the carbon tax starting.
In a world first, caught on camera at the G20, an Australian PM was complemented on their dress-sense. And it was Julia Gillard. Plus she got a kiss from Barak Obama. But it’s not the first time our PM has been kissed by a president; that last happened at John Howard’s receiving of the Medal of Freedom by George W. Bush.
The Rio and G20 summits may have achieved nothing, but at least the economy is in a worse state than the environment – we will run out of money to eat before the climate is ruined. If the summits arranged a deal with the Mexican drug cartel to fund raise, Julia Gillard could have made it back to a sports fundraising event. Mrs Conroy reported how $2m was raised, enough to keep one athlete in performance drugs for a month.
Shaun spoke to Maggie Bathysphere, who was still at the Olympic stadium in London, but the ABC Sports team had been watching YouTube clips rather than doing much reporting. Even with events such as Wimbledon and Tour de France happening around them, they were still preferring to use the services of the BBC or Fox Sports to watch them happen. But they could confirm, not one Australian was still in the tennis.
On the subject of Olympics, Mad As Hell had secretly filmed a ticketing corruption, where an official paid 100,000 Euros to get 100 people to attend the Canoe Slalom.
It was time one again for us to spend time with Bill Duthie and the Wisdom of the Elders, who was reminiscing about the change of the $2 note to the coin in 1988. He was glad to accept all of the examples Francis had. Bill himself had worked at the Royal Mint, and had entered his own design, but the scale and composition had made it impracticle – size of a dinner plate and made of solid gold.
And finally, Saudi Arabia has allowed one female athlete to the Olympics – shame her event is the 4×100 relay.
The first known website dedicated to Mr Micallef dates back to 1999, and was run by Chelsea Allen as part of her website HalfSmarts – hats off to Chelsea for being the first to bring Shaun to the world weird web!
The site featured information on the upcoming third season of The Micallef Pogram and the possibility of a new show: “Welcher and Welcher”. A number of the site’s fans at the time submitted questions, and Shaun answered them – so we’ve re-published them here, 13 years later!
The Pressing Question:
But how DO you spell “McGhan/McGahan,” Shaun?
It’s “McGhan”. The editor who used to do the graphics and titles on Full Frontal insisted on spelling it “McGahan” despite my objections. He also did the graphic for ‘Australian Nightly Network News’ as ‘Australian Nighty Network News’. The fool.
Chelsea of Brisbane, asks:
Is there a character that you particularly love to play?
Favourite character – Milo. No lines to learn and I get to destroy things.
Justin Edbrooke of Melbourne, asks:
In any of the sketches you’ve performed in, have you ever been hurt? I’d imagine playing Milo Kerrigan would be pretty dangerous, catapulting through walls and smashing things left and right.
Injuries – none. But I once gashed Kitty Flanagan’s leg during Milo Does Ballet when I threw her out of frame and she missed the gym mats. Kitty’s fault not mine.
What’s the word on a third season of The Micallef Programme?
Probably. But nothing is certain in the vague and amorphous world of TV. If it does go on it will not be filmed before July 2000 owing to Seachange 3 and Something In The Air (a new ABC Soap) occupying the studios. The third series will be quite different from the other two. More surreal. It’ll probably be the last one. Look for a new sit-com “Welcher and Welcher” which might be happening.
Have the Micallef Programme team cracked the overseas market for the show?
We are discussing a 3rd series with the ABC and one of the episodes is to be funded by a UK network for screening over there. This will be skewed for the UK market and may lead to sales of the other shows. Whether this actually happens is in the lap of the Gods and assorted executive producers.
Shane of Perth, asks:
Are most of the sketches written by you? Oh and who came up with the idea of you drinking from something different in every intro in the second series, who ever it was… PURE GENIUS!
I would write about a third of them on my own. I would co-write another quarter with Gary. He would do another third by himself. Although we read and offer suggestions on each others material. We have a couple of other writers who come up with quickies, ideas and other short sketches. They’d write about a sixteenth. And the cast would come up with stuff too – let’s say that’s a tenth of Gary’s third. So as a percentile.. I can’t work this out. Drinking vessels? My idea. We started it in the First Series though. I first asked for some water and Francis gives me a bag of goldfish in episode 3.
Dale also of Perth, asks:
If there is a third series or any more series (hope so), what other David McGhan segments will you do? Are you going to carry on with District Attorney Ferguson, or have you got any new ideas?
More David McGhan? Mmmm. Not sure about that. He might have done his dash. McCaffrie may get his way…
Meev B of Melbourne, asks:
Who is Gary McCaffrie? Will he be making an appearance on the show? Do you and he ever disagree on what is and isn’t funny when writing for your show?
Gary McCaffrie – my writing partner and friend since our days at Uni. He first encouraged me to write and perform and got me my job in Full Frontal. That’s him as ‘Person Of The Week” in the sketch before the domino record attempt. Do Gary and I ever disagree? Often. He hates David McGhan. He got me to stop doing Fabio and Milo which probably wasn’t such a bad thing. But I do like David McGhan and just sort of snuck the sketches past him until it was too late and we’d already built the set. Generally though if one of us doesn’t think something is up to it it’s out. He does trust me to make some things funny in performance though – like the Tilting Wine Cellar sketch and Spiffington Manse. They actually read very unfunny. It’s all in the delivery and it’s good to allow some sketches like that into the show.
Carmen of Brisbane, asks:
I really loved the end joke on the programme when there was the take-off of “The Seventh Seal”. Also, I had been walking around the house for years saying “Oh, Shane!” in an annoying voice and was overjoyed when it was on the end of the last show of the second series. Do you expect the wider audience to pick up on these ripping gags?
Obscure Jokes – Someone always gets them (as you did) but we try and do a few things at once so there’s always another joke for someone who might not get the reference.
John of Melbourne, asks:
What on earth possessed you to create Myron?
Myron was a salute to “The Red And The Blue” an Italian pixillated series which was on TV in the 70’s. It wasn’t as minimalist as our effort. Gary and I filmed ours ourselves in our office. We used a digital camera which made it very easy. We had a little white cyclorama made – which you can see gets grubbier and grubbier with every succeeding Myron. The signature tune was inspired by “Pingu” although it hasn’t ended up sounding much like it. The lyrics represent my own faltering schoolboy French.
Dale of Perth, asks:
Will there be a special titled, ‘The Best Of The Micallef Programme’ where all the best material you like in one special? (Though I personally think every episode has the best material.) Also, do you like old classic TV Shows (ie- Get Smart, Fawlty Towers, Hogan’s Heroes, Monty Python etc.)?
Best Of…and Influences – Not much chance we’ll see a Best Of video as the ABC don’t seem to think it’ll sell well. I have in fact already edited a Best Of from the first series and it’s just sitting in the archives. Write to the ABC demanding its release. As for influences – I guess Python is the big one. The Goon Show. Peter Cook and Dudley Moore. Woody Allen…would be others.
Diefledermaus of Adelaide, asks:
When the original Full Frontal went off air and everyone seemed to go their separate ways, how and why did you get the opportunity to have your own show on the ABC? (Of course we all know that there is always one to rise above the pack).
I enjoyed the experience of making the World Around Him Special and wanted to try for a series. Channel 7 passed on it so we pitched it to the ABC with a few changes. The special was pretty much the prototype for the series.
Wade “Your Gas Bill is Overdue” Shiell of Adelaide, asks:
If there were any way to do it, would you go back in time and perhaps change some of your characters? That is, have you been pleased with the way that the characters you brought to life have performed, and the way in which they’ve been received by the general viewing audience?
If I Could Go Back In Time…? I’d change a lot of stuff. Everything can be improved as far as I’m concerned. Some things were just bad ideas. Some performances were clumsy or beyond me. If I could back I’d probably be tinkering forever. Best just to erase the whole lot and start again.
Chelsea of Brisbane, asks:
Do you more prefer the processes of performing, or writing on the show, and in general? (Or editing, perhaps?)
Strangely enough I had not really ever considered this until your question. The writing is a hard slog and I like it less and less as I get older. I’ll do almost anything to avoid it. Performing I do enjoy very much, particularly when it works. But I really do miss performing for a real audience. Studio audiences are very supportive but it’s not quite the same as when they’ve paid to see you and it’s an occassion for everybody (including me). I do love getting a laugh and it’s not quite the same as something I’ve written getting a laugh when someone else performs it. I get a kick from it but it’s a bit like watching someone else open a present you’ve bought for them. All a bit vicarious. The editing is the most intellectually satisfying and is a vital part of the process. But sitting in a dark room for two weeks is not at all healthy.
Matthew of Melbourne, asks:
Will there be any more Myron?
Myron – he’ll be back but his budget will be bigger. We might have sets and costumes.
Chelsea of Question Hog, Brisbane, asks:
Do you ever think about the audience to which The Micallef Programme appeals, and find yourself trying to please or aim your humour at a particular demographic?
The ratings boffins tell me my demographic is very wide. 15-65 (rather like a Mattel game) but the majority are in the middle aged category. Personally I think the majority demographic depends on the time slot and day the programmers give us. Last year when we were on a Monday our majority demographic was in the 25-35 category. Go figure. They also tell me I appeal equally to men as women which is apparently unusual. My target audience at the moment are therefore bisexual pensioners who stay in of a Friday. None of this actually makes any difference to what we put in the show. We can only write what we think is funny and I can only perform in a way that is natural to me. Whether people like it or not is up to them. I do try for accessability – there’s no point in being too insular with humour. Being insular is usually a sign that you’re not terribly confident about whether you’re funny or not. Most comedians go through this phase in their 20’s. I know I did. But it all gets back to an answer I gave to one of the other questions about in-jokes. You try and work on as many levels as possible. Some people respond to Milo falling through a wall, others get the fact that sometimes when he answers questions he just describes the plots to old films (Citizen Kane and On The Waterfront to name but two). I like both aspects. But characters like McGhan and Milo have a limited shelf life. There’s no point repeating yourself, as I’ve found out a few times. So – in answer to your question, I guess I don’t aim for any group at all. It’s a mass audience as far as I’m concerned. Everyone in the audience is different and you’ve just got to try and bring as many together as possible so that they laugh at the same time at more or less the same thing. You bring them together with character and plot and then give them the gag. But people enjoy different aspects of the journey on the way to the gag (even if it’s about how your characters are dressed).
Dale of Perth, asks:
Why did you leave Full Frontal mid-way through the fifth season? Was it to work on The Micallef Programme?
No, I left because I was a bit tired of doing FF. I wanted to do something else. Gary and I wrote a pilot for a science fiction puppet sit-com which Channel 7 made and passed on. As we were writing it the ABC expressed interest in wanting a sketch comedy show that wasn’t like FF. I pitched one and it got through. The fact of the matter though is that the show is very much like a special I did for Channel 7 in 1996.
Kent Wagner of Brisbane, asks:
Hey Shaun, In the opening titles of the second series there are clips of sketches that you have filmed, but have not shown on any of your episodes! (eg. You dressed up as a lady, and Roz dressed as you) Will we ever get to see them?
The opening titles for the 2nd series were made up of stuff that we decided not to use in the show. There are three shots we recorded especially – me talking to the ghost, me in drag, and the vase getting smashed by the light.
Olivia Farag of Sydney, asks:
Which members from The Panel contacted you about appearing on their show, and what was your initial reaction?
Glenn Robbins asked me if I was interested. I had known Glenn since the time I first started writing for the Jimeoin TV show. (Glenn got me my first job doing voice overs for that show.) I was a little nervous about appearing live as myself. I much prefer being dead and someone else. The nerves have eased as I have appeared on the show more and more. Working Dog are a fine bunch of coves and go out of their way to support our show.
Chelsea [again?] of Brisburg, asks:
How does it feel to shed that comedic skin and play a dramatic role in SeaChange?
Mmmm. Wait until you see the performance, I’m not sure it’s all that dramatic. It’s no Rain Man, let me tell you.
January 7th 1953 – Johannes Salk was busy working away in his laboratory when he realised he had made a breakthrough – he had invented Polio (which already existed, and killed thousands every year) When his partner informed him they were meant to find a vaccine instead, he washed the results down the drain, but Polio is water borne, so he cleaned it up with Anthrax. The whole thing made Salk feel… mad as hell!
The week’s episode was guaranteed to contain no interviews with network sporting personalities.
Shaun didn’t feel angry about anything this week – maybe perhaps feeling a bit of envy. Of all the deadly sins, he wishes he had another. Maybe sloth, but he couldn’t be bothered changing. Shaun was envious of America (next door to Mexico – stupid country). Things are better there, at least from what he can see from TV. Barack Obama is cool, compared to the Australian parliament, which is very dull. Even Papua New Guinea is more interesting.
Even America’s mistakes are better than ours. And their losses. Queensland is in the red for $100 million, but in America, one man stole $7 billion in a Ponzi scheme. Jocelyn Stick (Veronica), Business Affairs Reporter, explained to Shaun how a Ponzi scheme works, and he seemed pretty taken by the idea.
Julia Gillard is a woman, and she admits it. Recently Julia raised the issue of the glass ceiling for women, saying it was cracked. Sandy Appleby (Tosh), Women’s Affairs Reporter, is concerned that all the men standing on it might fall through onto those women. Maybe a trapdoor should have been installed. The blue stocking movement might be strongest at the gusset, but if the women were on more boards, maybe they would reach the ceiling – metaphorically?
But Gina Rinehart is an exception. She’s sitting on many boards, and looks like getting some seats at Fairfax too. To explain it all, Shaun uses the prism of pop culture, starting with likening it to Citizen Kane, but when only a few understand, he eventually compares her take over of Fairfax to the movie Rock of Ages – “a terrible idea”.
Back to America, or specially, South America, they are celebrating the original Earth Summit in Rio de Janeiro. Great idea, talking about the saving of the planet when the Mayan calender predicts the end of it.
Tuffy Gorgan (Roz) reported on Craig Jevello, who has been preparing 15 years for the amageddon. He’s got his food supplies sorted, with most of it highly perishable, but he’s avoiding preservatives. His 17 year old dog will keep him company, and he’s got a Kindle for all his books. The council refused his application to install a chimney for his fireplace though. Tuffy refused his invitation to spend a night in the bunker. In a postscript, Shaun revealed Craig was later rushed to hospital with botulism, smoke inhalation, rabies, bullet wounds and dysntry. [Shaun laughed here, but when I saw the taping, he did this straight.]
The days of the old wall calendars might be numbered; good thing, they’d be useless otherwise.
Francis held a debate on the subject of gay marriage, and most of the panel discussing the topic were against it, including a representative of the Families for Family Friendly Australian Families. Child Psychologist Heather Snap was very keen to cite common sense research, such as that being born was important for children. In the end, the panel agreed that two hetrosexual, single sex people could get married, provided there was no intimacy. Even the Sister was satisfied with the absence of sex.
Later, Shaun promised to talk to a representative of Fairfax, who was annoyed that they found out about they jobs via a media company – since when has Fairfax known what was going on?
During the break, Miss Fisher was insistent that while the ABC Wednesday comedy schedule was looking like a victim, her Murder Mysteries were not a comedy, and would be seen among the line up, despite her diva-esque behaviour.
Back on the topic of Gina Rinehart, Elance Feelings discussed some of the mining industry terminology, such as FIFO (fly in fly out), HIHO (helicopter in and out) and TITO (train in and out) but Dido is a singer.
Opinions on “should immigrants be made to speak with an Australian accent” in Top of the Vox Pops varied – “we just took the shelves back to Ikea for a refund.”
Shaun can’t stand sport, so he crossed to Maggie Bathysphere and the ABC sports team who were in London for the Olympics, where most of the budget had already been spent, 3 weeks out. [Writer Michael Ward is hiding at the back of the team] Since nothing was actually happening, the team had been visiting CatsThatLookLikeKerryOBrien.com and iQing Lara Bingle – the first time those two words have been used in the same sentence. They did have some great behind the scenes footage from The Masters, where the famous Green Jacket was constantly adjusted depending on who was in the lead.
Apologies to any Channel 9 viewers who would be offended by seeing a woman talk about sport.
In Know Your Backbencher, a segment looking at the unsung (suu-kyi) members of the Australian Parliament, they focused on little known… Kevin Rudd, who works for his constituents on local issues by consulting with world leaders and always keeps his cool.
Most of us wish to live free and happy lives, and those who don’t should be forced to. In a new segment, Hey No Nanny State!, Shaun discusses our freedoms. Smoking is your right, and Shaun will defend it to your death. Although some government control is required, because a lot of people are idiots. But the new large (mock) packages are rediculous, so Shaun says Hey Nanny No. Violence on trains is out of control, but as long as transit police do as per the Vietnamese, and stay outside the vehicle even when it’s moving, Shaun says Hey Nanny No.
On the subject of bullying, Shaun is against the idea of suing parents of bullies. But he interviews Belinda Tenducca, his former bully, and she makes him think she bullied him because she had a crush on him at school. After she breaks his heart again, and he changes his mind to Hey Nanny Yes.
Finally, Aung Sung Su Chi picked up her Nobel Peace Prize from 1991 – couldn’t they have home delivered it, or at least refrigerated it? Here’s tomorrow’s talkback…
The was also an interview taped with Robyn Nevin, who stars in Queer Lear, but this might end up as web extra or in next weeks episode.
I was lucky enough to see another taping of Mad As Hell, and have a few previews to whet your appetite!
Poor Shaun fluffed his opening monologue most of the way through 3 times, and Tosh had some tongue twisting lines which forced Shaun to say “gusset” more times than I can remember!
There was a very clever debate on gay marriage (the cast were all excellent), a look at how the media can ‘hound’ their stories and a look at Gina Rinehart through the lens of pop culture.
Shaun held another real interview with the star of Queen Leer, Robyn Nevin, which was so post-modern, I couldn’t tell if it was going to be shown as is or to be re-recorded later.
I loved a segment they shot, which may have just been in-case of topical material changing later in the week, called Hey No Nanny, all about whether Shaun felt particular elements in our society were making us too much of a “nanny state” – the graphic alone is worth seeing.
I thought it was the best show yet.
Oh, and we found out at least one source for the names of the reporters – Carrington Mews is apparently an area in Adelaide!
Thank you Verity.
Shaun, not usually known for being one who’s internet-focussed, has released some new writing in the form of an eBook.
Ahead of the Game is a new short story from Shaun, just released through Penguin Shorts. Caspar Jolley is a thrillseeker with a gift for always staying one step ahead. Doctor Evelyn Flowers is a woman of science – and sensuality. Brought together by an off-street speedboat-racing catastrophe, will they be able to overcome a bizarre and confounding injury?
Also, Smithereens has been made available in a shortened eBook form, appropriately titled A Selection of Smithereens.
All of these (plus some of Shaun’s older titles) can be bought through Amazon’s Kindle service (or any other eBook service). The Kindle app runs on PC, Mac, Android or iOS – so there’s no excuse not to get some Shaun to read!
Shaun refused to go on unless he was paid $5000, but was happy to accept Cabcharges. Lucky, because tonight one of the stories was about police holding a man over a fire. This week, the show proclaimed to be “riding the 24-hour news cycle drug-free.”
When the audience wouldn’t hold their applause, Shaun fired a gun into the air. He did apologise for the over-the-top reaction. He was quite angry because how he felt about something and what he thought about it were different, and that made him furious. It was the story of Nick D’Arcy and Kenrick Monk being punished by the AOC for being photographed wielding guns in California. If they can’t use social media, how can they expected to tweet their emoticons?
Maggie Bathysphere (Emily) from ABC Sport felt it had been blown out of proportion, just because one had once lied to police and the other once punched someone in the face – who hasn’t?
Black Caviar, in comparison, is very well behaved. Punky Voltaren (Tosh) reported on her prospects racing at Royal Ascot, and assured Shaun that while she had a lot riding on her, it would only be the jockey during the race.
Shaun is concerned about sport on an international level, which does often raise national pride to the level of nationalism, which if taken too seriously is taken to the level of national socialism – then it’s no longer about including multiple countries from a race, but about excluding various races from a country.
Maggie agrees that racism has no place in sport, and the recent racism at Euro 2012 makes her glad we’re not part of Europe – it’s a stupid continent. But is our national pride any different to those Ukrainian supporters?!
Denzella Kabuki (Veronica) went to Tasmania to look at the use of cricket power as an alternative fuel source. Invented by Prof. Jasper Pong (Francis), he came on the idea of using the limbering up employed by cricketers to generate energy. One cricketer is working the n. They have generated enough power to run the Tamar Valley Power Station toilet hand dryer for a full minute.
Carbon Tax celebrations are about 3 weeks away, and Tony Abbott has been using tortured metaphors such as it being “a python squeeze instead of a cobra strike” but Damien Scranton (Francis) doesn’t think this is zoologically accurate. But he thinks Tony is right on one count (or is that a right …?) – being suffocated by a python would hurt from day one.
During the break was an ad from the Australian Defence Force – “defending our shores via Afghanistan.”
Shaun disagrees with censorship – people shouldn’t even be able to say the word. But the reprint of Mein Kampf has been changed to note Hitler’s errors and point out places where he recycled his ideas – often noted as one of Hitler’s greatest crimes. Shaun thinks that if they want to censor the book to help warn people off becoming National Socialists, then re-releasing the audio book, read by Mel Gibson, might help.
It was time for Top of the Vox Pops – “Should Freedom of Speed extend to other noises?” and opinions varied.
In finance news today, the markets closed down today. Even after all that bailing out.
The economy isn’t riding on the sheep’s back, it’s been driven in a truck owned by Gina Rinehart as Mrs Conroy (Roz) reports from the Mad as Helicopter. We dig up what we “made” earlier, but a slow down in the Chinese economy means we might not be able to sell as much coal, iron and uranium. If the resources boom goes bust, we won’t be able to prop up our manufacturing, which means we’ll rely on China for cheaper goods, boosting our economy again and making it impossible to criticise them for supporting the Assad regime.
Julia Gillard has been explaining her policies to children again, prosumably so they can explain it to their parents. Shaun thinks it is good to talk to children – they are the future – and there’s no point talking to old people.
You certainly can’t argue with the growth figures for last quarter, and Tureen Chip, Senior Economic Forecaster, didn’t see it coming. Was it incompetence? Even Joe Hockey knows that “the numbers are the numbers”.
Nice-One Johnson (Emily) spoke to Organza Quiz (Roz), a spokeperson for Joe Hockey, who finally caved that Hockey was ticked off that even though they are incompetent, the government still manages to pull of numbers like this.
Shaun hates negativity, so decides to be positive. So to talk about the fabulous economic growth figure, he spoke to a member of the inexpert anti-opposition Pinor Rouge, who instead began talking of the garden and “how growth has its season.” He also had a message for Rafael.
In Wisdom of the Elders, Francis spoke to Bill again about the 89th anniversary of Vegimite. It certainly didn’t exist before it was invented, and while Bill worked at the factory at the time, it he was sick the day it was invented. He never liked the “happy little Vegimites song” because of the line “rose in every cheek” – not sure about “a sandwich spread that promotes the fact that it will make your bottom flush”. Bill had his own version of the theme song, and played it for Francis.
Before handing off to the talk back, Shaun thinks we should get Rolf Harris, a recent OA recipient, returned to Australia – maybe in exchange for sending back Leo Sayer.
